Argh. I just want to get a pair of scissors and chop my hair right off. Not because it's bugging me or anything, but because I want to look like a boy.
I like wearing dresses and putting on makeup though, but I also want to look like a guy sometimes. I'm afraid that if I cut my hair really short, I'd end up regretting it and would have to wait a few years for it to grow back.
I want a male wig. D: One of those really nice K-pop styled ones. I probably wouldn't be able to get one until the next time I go to Taiwan (God knows how long), since everything in Taiwan is generally cheaper and I'd probably be able to try on a wig to see if it would suit me.
I want to be able to run my hand through my hair or flick my hair without looking like a narcissistic girl. I want to be able to laugh it off if someone calls me a "slut". I'd had a person calling me a slut before because I was apparently wearing a short skirt (that wasn't even 10 cm above my knee). Even though she was probably joking, I was pretty offended because I didn't know her well at all, so she really shouldn't be 'joking' like this. :\ But if I had been a guy in that situation, I'd probably say something like "Go suck a dick :D" and laugh instead of just walking away and letting myself be degraded that way.
Okay, I guess I could still say the same thing as a girl, but you know how girls always have to keep up with this pure, innocent image? Especially girls like me who are shy and quiet? If I say something 'mean' that is nothing compared to what other girls say, people would start spreading rumours about how vulgar I am.
I really want to be a guy. If I sounded arrogant, people would just dismiss it as being confident. As a girl, people would probably call me a "stuck-up bitch".
I know I've made an entry about this before but the urge to be a guy has suddenly come back, so I wanted to rant somewhere.
Kind of a short post today. Need to do a lot of work for French tomorrow.
No comments:
Post a Comment