OOTD: Lazy Days + Update

New blog theme! :D This one's not has ridiculously girly as my last one, lol.

These outfits are from a few months ago but I didn't think of uploading them here. They're all pretty lazy OOTDs - just a simple top paired with skinny jeans.

Black shirt with hot pink sleeve + collar borders and a sequinned design.

Fitted red top.

Purple shirt with fake-studded design.

The sleeves are translucent with a super cute bow by the collar. *u*

Even this selfie is lazy.

Aside from that, I haven't gotten any offers from any universities yet. I've submitted a portfolio just today and still need to get around to sending another one. I have an interview in exactly a week! ; ~; I'm actually not feeling nervous just yet - I don't think the realisation has kicked in yet. I should start preparing for it too.

The past two weeks have been super stressful because I had a lot of school work and then something happened to my boyfriend. Things have calmed down now - he's not moving out anymore. But this means we can't vidchat anymore while he's at home. Voice-calling should be safe, but we haven't been doing a lot of that either. :x We had an argument (well, more of a disagreement) the other day too. He was talking about another girl again whom he felt like was hitting on him. He said, "I'd be dumb to let you go over a risk since I know you better", which seemed to imply that the only reason he's sticking with me is because I'm "safe". He snapped at me a few days before that too, because I was blaming myself again for getting him in trouble. I ranted to a mutual friend (it was Girl X, actually. She's really nice, haha) and she said she's going to have a talk to my boyfriend about this since it wasn't fair that I was being treated like this.

Our argument led from the way he keeps wording things badly and causing me to misunderstand, to how he always gets angry at me now when I'm sad rather than being sweet like he did during the first few months of our relationships, to how I'm always sad for "no reason" and "never talk" in calls. I do talk a lot more in our calls now. A lot more than I did before. I'm still not fully conversational and talkative because I've always been shy and awkward, but I'm slowly getting used to it. It makes me sad when he keeps bringing that up as a problem all the time and accusing me of not trying when I've already made some progress. :c He's an extrovert while I'm an introvert, so he finds it hard to understand why it's so difficult for me to just talk. I told him how bad my social anxiety is: a few weeks ago, I raised my hand in front of a large class. All I did was ask the teacher a question, but afterwards I realised my hand was shaking uncontrollably. I couldn't stop the shaking. After he heard that, I think he felt bad and apologised. I apologised too for being so incompetent.

I think we have disagreements quite a lot compared to normal couples. Or maybe just our mutual friend is in a healthy, balanced relationship. Anyway, I'm going to try to stop being sad so often now. I really just need to get over my dumb insecurity issues and ask him if I misunderstand anything instead of being passive-aggressive. My insecurity issues were getting better the week before the whole thing with his parents happened. But then after receiving a hoard of texts from his older sister (married with kids) telling me that I was breaking apart their family and that if I really loved him, I'd break up with him, I think my problems came back again. Sigh. It'll take a while before I can really get better.

OOTD: Black Bear Dress

I don't think I've made any OOTD posts, haha. Not one in itself anyway.

So this is my outfit for today. My mom and I accompanied my brother to the train station since he's going away for university. It's just going to be me and my mom in the house now.

(Please excuse the dirty mirror.)

This dress is a bit too long for me. :c I was holding it up in the first pic. I think shorter looks cuter. I've only realised recently that a lot of my clothes are either too baggy or too long on me. I don't know if I can adjust them to fit me perfectly. x__x

Sorry this entry is so short and boring. Wanted to post something other than ranting about relationships for a change. I've been so moody the past few days. D:

Summer holiday! + OOTD: Blue Maxi

Well actually it's been a week into summer holiday already. I really should update my blog more. = = I just don't have much to write about, I guess. I think I generally only write entries when I'm sad and have no one to talk to, which might not be too good because looking back, it'll seem like I'm constantly depressed. I guess I'll spam some of my pictures from Instagram (@yuemie, follow me? :D).

Selfie I took on the last day of school.

And another one.

I suuuuper love how I look here. I wish I could look like this all the time. D: Usually I always have to liquify my face to get it to look normal, but I only edited away a few blemishes for this picture. I really want waist-length hair! *-* I'm just wearing extensions here.

So yeah, life's been pretty good. I have a lot of summer work to do thanks to art. = =; Seriously, if I wasn't taking art, I'd have absolutely nothing to do this summer. Wish I could just relax for a month.

I'm still Skyping with my bf everyday. c: Remember that entry I wrote over a month ago about how I didn't feel like I was a priority? Well, that has changed. I feel really important now. He calls me almost as soon as he comes home from work and we talk all the way until I have to go to sleep. We have a 5-hour time difference since he lives in the US, but we can manage. He's planning on visiting next summer and I'm looking forward to it. ^u^

I really hope this works out. I'm still kind of scared over getting my hopes up. There's just so many obstacles between us. We'll only be able to see each other once a year, and it'll be like that for a few years since we're going to university in our own countries. And if we do get through those few years, what do we do when we want to move in together? Should he come to the UK where everything is way more expensive and where it would be harder for him to find a job than in the US? Or should I go to the US where I'm foreign to everything and where it'll be harder for me to find a job? Plus I'd be far away from my mom too, since she's probably staying in the UK. There's just so much sacrifice involved.

Maybe I'm just thinking too much, haha. I really do hope this works out.