Saturday 24 September 2011

School Updates

Not a very interesting title, but I think that's what this post is mainly about. XD

I have a 4-hour long English controlled assessment exam on Monday. I still haven't prepared my notes yet. I do pretty well on controlled assessments (my essays are normally A-grade standards :D), but it's the exams that don't tell you the essay title until you sit down in silence in a massive hall that I fail at. And I suck at analysing newspaper articles and stuff like that. x_x I prefer poems where you can interpret the words artistically and symbolically.

Oh and my 'best friend' called me stupid at school the other day. I could tell she wasn't joking because of the way she said it - sort of quietly, like she knows that she was saying something rude. She's the real stupid one. She can't do something as simple as 7th grade maths (we were in 10th grade back then), which just consists of finding the nth term of basic number sequences, easy calculations, etc. She was trying to teach a 7th grader the questions she got wrong on a test paper too. I had to help my 'best friend' at least four times, and she didn't even thank me.

Okay, I know that not everyone's good at maths, but she was being so arrogant and rude about it. I sat with her as she taught the 7th grader, and when she got confused, she turned to me to silently ask for help. While I was in the middle of explaining the question, she just interrupts and repeated everything I said, as if she was trying to prove to the 7th grader that she didn't need any help at all. If she had let my finish explaining, the 7th grader could have thought that we were taking turns in helping her, but what my 'best friend' did just made herself look like an idiot.

Yet she still dares to call me stupid. If a genius called me stupid, I would've accepted it. In blunt honesty, I'm a total idiot compared to Albert Einstein (of course) and other gifted people like him. I'm not depressed over it or anything; I'm just facing the truth. But someone who has worse grades than me in almost every single subject, no common sense and a bad attitude has no rights to call me 'stupid'.

Here's the long and boring part - I need to tell you the reason why she called me stupid too. You can skip this paragraph and the next if you want, sine I wrote a summary of the argument. ^^; In my school, we have our own accounts on the computer system where we can save files in our own folders. There are printers that we can use, but the school created a system where you have a total of £5.00 (not real money) at the start of each month on your account to limit your use of the printers. For every black and white A4 page you print, £0.03 gets deducted from your £5.00 and so on. Last year, the cost of everything you print was in multiples of 3, like £0.03, £0.06, etc. So the total of everything you have printed in the entire month should be a multiple of 3 as well, right?

On my 'best friend's account, she had £0.18. I had £0.17. She was like "Haha, I have more money than you!".
So I said, "Why is the difference £0.01? Shouldn't the difference between our money be a multiple of 3, since all of the costs of printing paper is also in a multiple of 3?"
Then she was all like, "Well duh! We didn't print the same things you know!"
I said, "I know, but the difference should still be a multiple of 3."
She said, "But isn't the cost to print an A3 paper £0.26 now?? You're the one being weird!!"
After a lot of arguing, she just confused herself and said, "The money we have left should be a multiple of 3, since the cost of everything is in a multiple of 3!"
And I said, "Exactly, so how come the different between us £0.01? Like I said, it should be a multiple of 3."
Then she blabbed on about nonsense and explaining my own point, then declared that I was 'stupid'. -_-

So this is a summary of the dumb argument:
  • I was explaining my point.
  • 'Best friend' disagreed and said I was weird.
  • I continue to explain my point.
  • She gets confused and explains my point to me.
  • I agree with her (since it's my point -_-) and said that something must be wrong with the money system.
  • She thinks that my point is her point, and thinks I was disagreeing with her so she calls me 'stupid'.
Oh and guess what? It turned out that I was wrong. The school changed the cost of how much it is to print something, so it is no longer in multiples of 3. But my 'best friend' stole my (wrong) point and then calls me stupid. *facepalm*
It would've been different if she called me stupid while I was incorrectly explaining it, but she agreed with my point, thinking that she was the one who came up with it. Don't ask me how, because I have no frickin' idea. -_-

A lot of stupid things like this has happened before. There was a time when she stole my apple juice box and held it out of my reach while I was trying to take it back, then she squeezed the box by accident and the juice sprayed out of the straw and over her table. Here's the funny thing: She got mad and refused to talk to me. If anything, I should have been the one who was angry since she wasted the money I spent on my juice box.

Stupid?

Very.

Tuesday 20 September 2011

Blandness

Just a normal school day today. Here's an update of my life:

Today, one of the girls in my class asked if she could sleep over at my house for a day in February because her family is going on holiday without her. That might sound really selfish to you, but she told her parents that she didn't want to go on the trip but she still carries on complaining that she's being abandoned. Makes no sense. -_-

Anyway, I just told her 'no' immediately because I don't like her. She's a fake friend and spread rumours about me cutting myself and being emo around the class (it spread to the other classes too), so a lot of people think I'm suicidal. I confronted her about this and she said "But I was so worried about you! <:(". Bull crap. If I really were suicidal, spreading rumours about me would have made me even more depressed. Telling everyone that I cut myself doesn't solve anything.

During my art lesson in the morning at school today, the whole class had to paint over a photograph we took of ourselves with different moods. At first I thought the teacher was letting us focus on painting techniques rather than fussing over the outlines, but then she told us to paint over every single inch of the photo and say that we completely painted it when we're doing our annotations. I'm pretty sure that sounds like cheating though. o ~ o;;

While I was in the middle of painting my nose on my photo, the art teacher came around and started telling me to do the area above the lips properly and said that I was losing the concept of the whole exercise. Oh okay, I need to improve, I'm willing to accept that. Thanks for your tips.

But guess what?

I HADN'T EVEN STARTED PAINTING THAT PART YET.

How the hell would you know that I need to improve something I haven't finished yet? Unless you somehow read the future and knew that I was going to paint it badly. It's like cutting off someone in the middle of their sentence, and assuming what they're about to say is something stupid. I hadn't even started. I would have been okay with it if she had said it like a reminder, but she just blindly announced that I wasn't getting it. *facepalm*

I guess that part wasn't very ordinary but it still wasn't that big of a deal, really, so this post's title is still 'Blandness'. :D I'll just finish here~

Friday 16 September 2011

Male

I'd like to be a guy.

That probably sounded like I'm a freak or something. ^^; It doesn't mean that I'm attracted to girls, want sex change in the future or anything like that. I'm just really curious what it would be like to be a guy. I feel like I can be more confident and 'attractive' as one - although that probably made no sense.

I've been imagining what look I'd go for if I were a guy at school today: K-pop styled short hair with a full or side fringe, long shirts with skinny jeans, hoodies, eyeliner to make my eyes look sharp and long, carrying my bag over one shoulder, looking a bit too pretty for a guy, cool (sexy xD) poses, and so on. I go to an all-girls school and we have to wear a skirt as part of the uniform, but we're allowed to wear our own clothes in 12th grade (next year!) so I wouldn't look off with a short haircut (although I really like long hair).

I also want male friends. I actually don't know any guys in real life apart from my relatives. What would it be like to have a guy as a friend? No rumour-spreading, no backstabbing, no you're-prettier-than-me-so-I-hate-you, no you-are-more-popular-so-you-suck, and all that stupid crap? Sounds like a dream come true.

I've always liked friendships between guys. It's sort of pure, in a way, and touching. The whole "I got your back" thing is just really beautiful to me, unlike most of the girls in my school who backstab their own friends. Plus, with male friends, you can shove each other around and wrestle for fun. xD

Those are the reasons why I'm interested in cross-dressing. Even if it's not permanent, I'd like to just try walking around as a guy for a while.

I kept randomly imagining the stuff that could happen while crossdressing in 12th grade at school. Looking like an attractive guy and getting a lot of attention (sorry, I'm a little vain ^^;)~ It all looks so fun in my head. I wouldn't be that annoying and quiet 'freak' in the corner anymore. I'd be a whole new person with confidence and strength. No one would pick on me anymore.

~

I found a lot of amazing male wigs on a Korean website. Too bad I can't read Korean. D:

They're all so pretty~ I want to buy them all. D: I admit that the attractive models made the wigs look even better. *can probably never pull it off as well as they can* ^^;

Thursday 15 September 2011

Ordinary

Nothing much has been happening lately. I've been pretty organised compared to last year since I've done most of my homework. :D

For the past couple of months, I've lost interest in piano. It used to mean a lot to me and back then, I couldn't even imagine not being able to play. I don't know what happened. But today, I made myself print the music sheet for 'Le Onde' by Ludovico Einaudi.


It's so beautiful~ <3 I can play this song, but not as amazingly (of course!). I'm a little inspired to practise but I have a small migraine right now so I guess I'll play tomorrow, maybe.

I kind of wish I was a YouTuber right now. xD It sounds fun to video-blog, upload make-up tutorials or record yourself singing, dancing, playing the piano, etc. I'd really love to upload videos of myself playing the piano but to be honest, I'm not that great at it. > <;; I'd also like to dance and sing, although I've never tried either one whole-heartedly before. Maybe I will once I'm older and live by myself (I'd feel too shy to record a video with people in the house, and my parents probably wouldn't approve of it). xD

I sort of quitted Puricute because I've lost interest in posting photos of myself. And and~! I feel like changing my Blogspot URL because the name "Mitsuni" doesn't feel very me-ish, if you get what I mean. Still thinking of a more suitable and comfortable name though~

Sunday 11 September 2011

Updates

So about my super crappy English exam result: my English teacher told the whole class that there's something weird going on with the examiners or something, because a lot of people (like me) didn't get the grade they were expected to. At least I'm not alone. :D He said that we might be able to retake the test. I don't have my notes on the book we did anymore though, but I'm still willing to give it another try.

Thursday and Friday were pretty normal (boring). I always get really bad migraines once a week during school. I didn't get one while I was in Taiwan during the summer holiday, but they've suddenly come back again. I've been getting a bunch of homework just on the first two proper days of school. x_x I talked to my 'best friend' about the stress I'm already feeling, and she was like "Stress? How?? Why???". The way she said it was as if she has never felt stress before rather than meaning that the homework wasn't that big of a deal, so I was just like "...". I hate how she freaks out over tiny things, like me biting my nails.

I went to China Town with my parents today. A governor of Taiwan booked one floor of a restaurant to organise a one-hour long speech/debate about the trading relationship between Taiwan and China, or something; I wasn't really listening. I just went there for the free lunch. ^^; A lot of people there (and in Taiwan) mistook me for a college student. Do I really look that mature? xP

Sunday tomorrow. Tonight's the last night of being able to sleep in; at least, not for another week. Lots of art to do tomorrow too. D:

Wednesday 7 September 2011

Wasted Time

As you know if you've read my previous entry, school started for me today.

And it was so pointless. I'm serious.

First, we got to know our new form tutor, then a 'welcome back' assembly and we got our homework planners and timetables. Those were alright. But then the school gave us an hour-long lunch break as usual, even though the school day started two hours later than usual (I mean, I'd rather just go home already). Then after a waste of one hour, all we did was sit in the classroom and talk since we had nothing to do. The talking and eating was pointless. We could've been at home studying or something.

During all that talking though, a Korean and a Japanese girl in my class talked to me about Asian dramas and music. We don't normally talk to each other, so that was good (although it was only for around 5 minutes). I don't think they'll talk to me any more though. D:

On a sad, annoying, angry, depressing note, I got a freaking C in one of my English GCSE exams, which accounts for 25% of the whole thing. C. I'm so annoyed with myself. I'm so stupid. I was one mark away from a B too. Although I'd still be disappointed with a B, a C just makes me want to smash my head into a wall. A lot of people got As and A*s. ; ~ ; I got the exact same number of points as my 'best friend' though, oddly enough. I wish wish wish that the examiners copied her mark onto mine by accident. I want to retake it if I could, even if I had to pay.

And now I'm just blaming myself for not studying hard enough. But the strange thing is that my English teacher made my class do a practice essay on the same book I did for the exam, and I got an A. I've also gotten consistent As on the numerous essays I've done in the past. How did my grade-A standard work become a C?

I just hope that they made a mistake.

Monday 5 September 2011

School

I'm dreading Wednesday, which is when I start school again. I hate a lot of people in my class since they treat me like crap, and I don't have one friend that I could trust (apart from one who I talk to on Skype, but she's in another class so I can't talk to her much in school). My class is almost basically filled with pathetic people who thinks it makes them really cool to spread rumours and say shit about people behind their backs. It's sick.

I actually want to share this blog with my classmates sometimes, just so they'd know how I really think and feel; that I'm not a stupid log with no opinions and emotions. They'd get a big shock just from the swear words here.

The thing about school: most people prefer active lessons where they do group work, science investigations, etc. But I hate those the most. I'm like the class loner, so nobody wants to be in a group with me. I'm always the odd-one-out. I can feel that they don't like me. I wish I could just sit and write notes peacefully on my own. Sometimes I hate friendship. It's like the most friends you have, the more credible you are, the more trusted you are, the more powerful you are. Why do I always get the fake friends who backstab me?

It just isn't fair.

Thursday 1 September 2011

Useless

It's already September and I've still done no work at all. Nothing.

I spent the last four days doing- I don't even remember what I did. Probably just stared at my Tumblr dashboard, lurked on Puricute, logged in and out of Facebook repeatedly. The schedule I wrote turned out to be a complete waste.

...Yeah, I'm a pretty sad person.

I feel bored and stressed from being cooped up in the house for so long. I don't have any friends that I can go out with, and I don't know where to go either. If you're reading this right now, you must be very, very bored.

I kind of want a newer Mac laptop right now or a Windows, then I could download MMORPGS and other games. I'm bored of TinierMe and have forgotten how to socialise on Towns. I really need some new friends too, thanks to Bubble.